Yada yada bing bang

Why hello there!

It’s been a while… and I actually can’t believe how fast time is going by and how many things I’ve managed to do since the last time I was here (was it seriously back in September that I wrote on here last??!! HOWWW has time gone by that quickly??!!)

Ok let’s see… STILL SOBER, still smoke free – it has been 924 days according to my app, which is 2 1/2 years. Wild… It is definitely easier now for sure, but there’s still the occasional time that a craving or urge or all-consuming desire to drink will blindside me. I just ride them out. I know that they’ll pass and that when they do I will be so grateful that I did not give in. Sometimes I play out in my mind “Ok what will happen if I have a drink or two tonight to get through this rough time or just because I feel like being social and drinking?” and then I think of the pretty much worst case scenario, because – why glorify or romanticize it?

I have been doing a lot of work on myself working through the feelings and emotions and all that fun stuff. It’s quite interesting when you can’t escape it! I truly feel like such a different person – so much more calm and nurturing and understanding and so so proud of myself. I still have some bad days, but the good FAR outnumber the hard ones.

I have been doing a lot of work on my house too! IΒ  started off by replacing a few light fixtures. And then I spent a LOT of time thinking about what to do with my dark little kitchen and I decided to paint the cupboards and walls and put a backsplash up. That’s a really big job by the way – painting the cupboards… much more time consuming than I had anticipated haha. For the backsplash I went with a cool metallic looking glue-down plastic one by Fasade. OOooo LOVED it! Super easy. Super eye-catching. Seriously my kitchen now makes my heart happy when I walk into it. So thennnn I decided to redo the bathroom. Yikes. New toilet, new vanity, new floor and installed a backsplash behind vanity & toilet wall (went with same fasade brand, different tiles… very much a wow factor). This one pushed me to my limits, but I can’t even begin to tell you how proud I am of myself for taking it on. It was not easy at all, especially with it being such an old house.

I have been doing a lot of work on my relationships with friends and family. This is a tough one. I have had to recently cut a few friends out of my life. One I haven’t really enjoyed being friends with since I quit drinking. I think that I may have mentioned her off and on in here. I found that I would feel anxious at the thought of getting together with her and then feel angry or unsettled afterwards. The other friend has been a friend since childhood but the past few years have definitely put a strain on our friendship. This has given me extra time and energy to nurture friendships and relationships that I truly cherish.

I have been doing some traveling. I found a ridiculously cheap deal on a trip to China ($598 all inclusive for flights, hotels, tours, most meals, etc for 10 days/8nights). My boyfriend/adventure partner and I took the chance (we honestly thought it might be a scam and had a whole backup plan in case we got to the airport and we weren’t actually on a flight to China). Anyway – REALLY GREAT EXPERIENCE. Really great. If anyone has any questions, feel free to PM me or ask in comments below and I’m happy to answer. I have a national board meeting coming up on the East Coast and my boyfriend/adventure partner is going to go with me and we’re taking an extra 9 days to hike, camp, drive and explore the atlantic provinces. So excited about that.

❀

 

11 comments

  1. winoholicblog · May 7, 2019

    Wow you are doing awesome!! The trip sounds amazing and great job on all the home improvements. I think one of they keys to sobriety is keeping busy and trying new things. I know when I was drinking I had zero motivation. Sobriety really does open up your world.

    Liked by 1 person

    • shehidbehindtheglass · May 8, 2019

      Thank you!! Yes, definitely keeping busy and trying new things has been key for me. It’s also so gratifying to be able to keep going on a project in the evening instead of powering out or making stupid mistakes because i had a couple of glasses of wine.

      Like

  2. Adrian · May 8, 2019

    Thanks for checking in! Love the kitchen painting and backsplash πŸ™‚ And intrigued by your China adventure. Wow. Where did you fly from (roughly)? And…. thank you for noting how, at 2.5 years, you still get blindsided. That sort of reporting is really helpful for me (@300plus). That cravings at that point still happen and are normal….

    Liked by 2 people

    • shehidbehindtheglass · May 8, 2019

      Hey Adrian!!! Way to go on 300+ days!! That’s fantastic, seriously!!
      For China I flew from Calgary Alberta (Canada). I live in Manitoba but it was cheaper to add on a flight to Calgary than fly from Winnipeg. So that $598 was also in Canadian.
      Re the blindsided and random cravings, it’s so weird! I’ll also get the “hmm… I could probably just drink socially” or “hey it would be cool to have a glass of wine with dinner” or whatever thoughts. But I’m not going down that road. I truly love my life alcohol free. I truly love how clear minded I am on weekend mornings, and my “extra” time I have now, and so much more. I’ve also had some really really rough patches emotionally the past 2.5 yrs and I’m so, so happy that I didn’t seek that escape.
      I’m so proud of you Adrian, I truly am. I know it isn’t always easy, but I truly hope you find that it is worth it.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. A Better Path · May 9, 2019

    Gosh, this is amazing. I am just over 3 years and I have been doing so many of the same things! Redoing my house and working on my relationships. When I was younger I thought I wasn’t creative or handy but I have found I can be both those things. Congrats to you!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Untipsyteacher · May 9, 2019

    You are just amazing!
    I sure wish I had your energy levels!
    Much love!
    xo
    Wendy

    Liked by 1 person

    • shehidbehindtheglass · May 18, 2019

      Hey you!! You have an amazing amount of energy! I love seeing and hearing about your daily walks and adventures! Hope your renos are going great!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. morethanmyshare · May 18, 2019

    Congratulations! I too get strong cravings and ideas from time to time. but as you said, i know it will pass. and i know i’d rather resist the craving than exist through a hangover. I’m coming up on 1000 days (as I know you are) it’s quite exciting isn’t it? one thousand days one day at a time.

    Liked by 2 people

    • shehidbehindtheglass · May 18, 2019

      Morethanmyshare, congratulations on coming up on 1000 days! That is so exciting! It also is nice to hear that I’m not the only one dealing with the cravings and ideas like that so far into sobriety. Those are far surpassed by so many amazing days and memories though! Excited for you! 😊

      Like

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