Flux

~11 months yesterday~

I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting lately. It’s amazing to me how much has changed in the past 11 months in my life and, even though I seem to be in a constant state of flux I am hanging in there.

The past week or so with the living arrangement change (I’m now living in the attic of my house while one of my grown children and his fiance are on the main level. Not as bad as it may sound – it’s a cute little finished living area in the attic!) I’ve been finding myself romanticizing the thought of alcohol. I think it may be the “You’re doing better now, so maybe you won’t have a problem with drinking. Wouldn’t it be nice to have a glass of wine when you get home?” thought pattern. I’m like constantly doing the X motion and silent noooo in my head. I am also constantly reminding myself of all of the good things that have happened since I quit drinking, including all of my little adventures that I have been on, and a big one that I’m heading off on tomorrow!

I try to pop in here and catch up on everyone when I can, but I hope that you are all doing really well. ❀

 

22 comments

  1. saoirsek · September 26, 2017

    Oh I know that feeling… “the reward for being good” Think it through, never ends well…for me anyhow. Well done on your sober time S x

    Liked by 2 people

  2. soberinvegas · September 26, 2017

    oh man i so know what you mean! I can really romanticize a drink…and then I have to make myself play the whole thing out because when I remember the nights of bad sleep, bad decisions, and feeling terrible the next morning, I remember that not drinking feels better. But it is HARD! ❀ hang in there. Also, your living arrangement sounds pretty great! Hooray for families being together! πŸ™‚

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Elizabeth · September 26, 2017

    Congratulations on # 11! and your new digs! Remember those sly voices for what they are- misguided and dangerous. Onward!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Dewy · September 26, 2017

    Yay . Have lots of fun . Can’t wait for the stories.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. ainsobriety · September 26, 2017

    Change can bring on thoughts like that.
    But it sounds like you know better.
    Just keep reminding yourself that the kind and compassionate choice is never booze. There are some many nicer alternatives. Bubble baths, a good book, chocolate. Salty fries… mmmm

    Liked by 1 person

    • shehidbehindtheglass · September 26, 2017

      So true that it is the kind and compassionate choice. So very true. And I feel more kind and. I’m passionate now that I’m treating myself that way. Mmmm fries and chocolate and bubble baths and great coffee…

      Liked by 1 person

  6. shehidbehindtheglass · September 26, 2017

    So true that it is the kind and compassionate choice. So very true. And I feel more kind and. I’m passionate now that I’m treating myself that way. Mmmm fries and chocolate and bubble baths and great coffee… 😊😊

    Like

  7. MrsMac · September 26, 2017

    I always think drinking would be like taking a step backwards in life. I like looking forwards to a future I’m going to be ready and fully present for. Well done on 11months x

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Untipsyteacher · September 27, 2017

    So good to hear from you!
    I am glad you are ok and on another adventure!
    I had one those romantic thoughts myself lately.
    But I turned my focus to ice cream!
    xo
    Wendy

    Liked by 1 person

  9. tiredoftreadingwater · September 28, 2017

    Congrats on 11 months! πŸ™‚ I still have those romanticising thoughts occasionally too, they’re obviously deeply ingrained. Your attic sounds cute, I love a smaller, cosier living space.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Paul S · September 29, 2017

    Congrats on 11 months! And yes, I am totally the person who felt the urge to drink to “celebrate” anything. It’s not when I felt down that I wanted to drink, but when I fell “up”! So I get this. But glad that it passed. And I like the sound of that attic space!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Ingrid · October 2, 2017

    Congrats! I had all of these thoughts (and more) when I was nearing and just past the one year mark. Milestones are BIG triggers for me to romanticize and minimize my drinking issues. I think it will pass soon. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Hurrahforcoffee · October 4, 2017

    Well done on 11 months. Yeah, that alcohol voice can come a knockin when you least expect it. You know that everything that voice says is a lie. He is s sleasy salesman trying to peddle his wares. There is no glass…only a bottle or two or three. xxx

    Liked by 1 person

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