Challenged

98 days! I’m so close to 100 I can taste it. I remember about a week into sobriety, after I had signed up for Belle’s (Tired of Thinking About Drinking) 100 day challenge, I counted out the 100 days on my calendar, starting in the 2016 one and ending in a new 2017 one. I wrote on each month the daily counts in 1 week increments, and circled Feb 2 and wrote “100!!”. It seemed so far away. I have already continued on now to mark down up to 150.

It is amazing how different each month has been, and what has kept me going through each one. The first month I was so exhausted and emotional and fidgety. I bought so many books and read continuously, or baked up sweet treats, pre-made and froze casseroles and soups, had lots of baths and foot soaks and lots of “curl up on the couch under a blanket or curl up in bed and feel sorry for myself” times.

The second month I still read and baked and cooked, but it was fun N/A drinks that kept me going. Different brands of root beers and ginger ales, and mixing up my own concoctions of pomegranate juice, pineapple juice and 7-up. Going out to the pub or lounge and asking the bartender or waitress for a FUN non-alcoholic drink. Wanting to socialize more but trying to figure out how. Trying to find myself again, and figure out who I was, sober. I had lots of down times, sad moments, and beating myself up emotionally moments for things I had done when I was drinking, time and money I had wasted. I also navigated my way though Christmas and New Years, which wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be. It was also during this time that I had a huge moment of clarity and realized that I really wasn’t the one missing out. By being sober I was remembering so much, present for so many great moments, and getting so many things done and accomplished.

This past month it has been exercise and focusing on healthier eating. I started running again just after Christmas and started out really slowly. I pulled out my old wii console and the fitness games that I had bought years ago with it, and started an evening routine of boxing (15 mins), running (10-15 mins) and yoga or stretching/strength (10 mins). I’m now up to boxing (1/2 hr), running (20 mins at a faster pace), and 10 mins of a step or balance or yoga or whatever. I usually get up early to get a 10-20 min run in in the morning as well. I have a jawbone UP fitness band that I use (if anyone has one, feel free to add me as a friend on the app – Donna W. with a pic of me in a pink snowmobile helmet w/ thumbs up and we can do step duels haha), and I’ve started eating more fruits and veggies. I have found that my taste has really changed – I can’t tolerate salty foods and I’m eating (and enjoying) more veggies. That is just pure craziness, what is wrong with me?! πŸ˜‰ Of course I still have a major sweet tooth! The first few weeks I really had to push myself to exercise, but the more I did it the better I’ve felt and I look forward to it now and actually get fidgety if I don’t. I used to run a lot about 5 yrs ago, but I was smoking and drinking a lot then, so felt completely different. Heck, I used to put wine in my water bottle when I would run on the treadmill or even out for a run. Yikes.

What a roller coaster. 2 more days. I’m so proud of myself πŸ™‚ ❀

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43 comments

  1. Merry B. Sober · January 31

    AMAZING!!!! 3 Digit Day Finish Line in View! (Any closer to going to Hawaii????) πŸ™‚

    Liked by 2 people

    • shehidbehindtheglass · January 31

      heehee, I have spent all my spare money on fun N/A drinks and ingredients to bake yummy treats with and a few pampering sessions. I am going to start buckling down with the spending & saving for a trip starting… the end of Feb πŸ˜‰

      Like

  2. morethanmyshare · January 31

    It’s great, isn’t it? I never thought when i was drunk all the time that sobriety could be EXCITING! I’m proud of you too!

    Liked by 3 people

  3. ainsobriety · January 31

    Awesome!!!!
    Isn’t exercising so much easier when you aren’t sweating out booze??!!

    Liked by 3 people

    • shehidbehindtheglass · January 31

      It really is! I have been thinking about that so much lately – I can’t believe my endurance and energy levels!

      Like

  4. daisy4leafclover · January 31

    Wow! 98 days amazing, amazing! Well done, love seeing how things changed for you over the months. That really helpful to someone like me, starting out. X

    Liked by 2 people

    • shehidbehindtheglass · January 31

      You’re doing great, Daisy! I honestly couldn’t have made it this far without the amazing support and encouragement I got on here, and from reading what others were going through or had gone through. We’re all in this together ❀

      Liked by 2 people

      • daisy4leafclover · January 31

        We definitely are, and I’m very grateful to be a part of this support network x

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Newchapter · January 31

    What an achievement. Well done! 99 days is my longest so far. But not as long as I want this time to be 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Hurrahforcoffee · January 31

    I am so proud of you too. You are doing so well! xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    • shehidbehindtheglass · January 31

      Thank you so, so much Hurrah ❀ ❀ How's the quitting smoking going?

      Liked by 1 person

      • Hurrahforcoffee · January 31

        Very well actually I’ve stopped using chocolate as a replacement and I’ve been forgetting about it, which means I’m past the worst of the withdrawals. Now I just need to make sure I don’t pick up a cigarette when I’m around my old smoking palls. xxx

        Liked by 1 person

      • shehidbehindtheglass · January 31

        That’s great! Way to go Hurrah! ❀ Take gum with you and some tic tacs (if you have those across the pond) or hard mints to crunch down on with your teeth, and something to fiddle with with your fingers. I'm finding now I can't stand the smell, but holy crow do I ever get cravings at weird times for a smoke! I need to get something to keep my hands busy – I keep catching myself wringing my hands like some worrying old hen hehe.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Hurrahforcoffee · February 1

        knitting?

        Liked by 1 person

      • shehidbehindtheglass · February 1

        oh boy… maybe I should give in and try that.

        Liked by 1 person

  7. beththesobergirl · January 31

    So much to be proud of!!! And inspirational to the rest of us – love your story!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. asobermiracle · January 31

    You should be proud! Did you think you were going to make it? It’s fun to read your first few posts after all this progress. You are really a different person. Congratulations!!!
    xoxo
    Shawna

    Liked by 1 person

    • shehidbehindtheglass · January 31

      Shawna, no I didn’t think I was going to make it. I’m actually really emotional about it right now, thinking back on the lonely, scary days I made it through. There were days that the ONLY thing that kept me from “having just one drink!” Was telling myself over and over that I had to come on here the next day and update my day number. There were days that I actually hid under the covers in bed, or had long hot showers just to get through a raging craving. It seems so surreal! I feel like such a different person! Thank you!
      Xo
      Donna

      Liked by 1 person

      • asobermiracle · January 31

        You are a different person. ; )
        I just used your post in my latest post. It’s amazing how often what you write to someone else is what you most needed to hear. ; )
        xoxo!
        Shawna

        Liked by 1 person

  9. Paul S · January 31

    Congrats! Fantastic!

    It took me two years to find running – and you rediscovered it so quickly! For me, running / exercise is a big part of my recovery – the whole mind-body-spirit connection thing. Running makes me feel better, and that makes me eat better and it all makes me feel better about myself.

    Great work!

    Liked by 1 person

    • shehidbehindtheglass · January 31

      Paul, I’m glad you found running, isn’t it wonderful? You’re so right about the mind-body-spirit connection. Thanks for dropping by!

      Liked by 1 person

  10. Elizabeth · January 31

    So freakin’ awesome! This post is so uplifting- you should be proud. I hope some of your exercise vibe rubs off on me. πŸ˜‰

    Liked by 2 people

  11. girl undrunk · January 31

    I’m on the Belle train too! Lol. You are awesome and congrats! 😊

    Liked by 2 people

    • shehidbehindtheglass · January 31

      Thank you so much for your words of encouragement and congratulations! I go to the 100 day challenge post quite often to read the comments from new people signing up. It’s how I found some of the people I follow on here too πŸ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Carrie Ann · January 31

    What a wonderful thing to celebrate! Not too far behind…but “miles to go before I sleep.’

    Liked by 2 people

  13. Pingback: Love Letter on Ten Months Sober | Finding a Sober Miracle
  14. moderndaygirlsober · January 31

    So cool!! Be very proud of yourself, big smiles πŸ˜€

    Liked by 1 person

  15. dewyplace · February 1

    We are proud of you too ..

    Liked by 1 person

  16. bad301 · February 1

    2 more days and your goal that you have set will come true. The taste and the want is there. But what about 101? Do you have another goal ready to go? Are you? You can do this! Can’t wait till I read the 100 blog! -Bruce

    Liked by 1 person

    • shehidbehindtheglass · February 1

      Thanks Bruce! Yes, I already have 150 on my calendar and will keep going. I know that I will never be able to moderate, so my goal is to well and truly love and appreciate the beauty of a clean and sober life πŸ™‚

      Like

  17. SWMum · February 1

    I love your honesty. I found one of the hardest things to accept once those early intense white knuckle days passed, was there was still life and all its crap to deal with and this time without the crutch of alcohol. Reading how other folks are coping with the differences of each passing month has been both reassuring and incredibly helpful. Well done you. xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    • shehidbehindtheglass · February 1

      It’s good for me too, to write out the posts that show that it isn’t an easy journey. It serves me as a reminder of what I had to go through to get to this point, and I’m glad if it can help other people too. ❀

      Like

  18. beingmesober · February 1

    That is so awesome!!! Good for you!!! So good to read!

    Liked by 1 person

  19. audreycandoit · February 1

    Congrats hon!! You are doing great. Love the post. Month by month feelings is so needed by many to hear. Big hugs. xxx oo

    Liked by 1 person

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